Wednesday, November 14, 2012

What's that?


One of my main fears, or one of the grossest things for me depending on my mood, is getting stuff in my eyes and having subsequent eye infections. Not just like, flying debris, but bacteria or germs or sneezes or aerosolized mind altering substances. That kind of stuff.
I mean I am still scared of wood chips or screws, bullets, bigger things like that, but it is the stuff I can't really see that gets me the most worked up.

It is this aversion to things in my eyes makes what happened last night so perfectly fitting.
Here I go writing a blog about my perfect day, and I figure: What better way to cap off a perfect day than to floss between my teeth? Right?
Wrong.
I was flossing, and I must have snapped the floss somehow against my fingers, and a bit of whatever it was that was hiding between my molars flew right into my...

Guess where?

My EYE! Good guess!

SO I did what you normally do when one of your worst fears comes true.
I screamed!
And I didn't even stir the Burger.
After I collected myself, I realized that I could see the molar scrapings on my eye!
Aghhhhughhh.

All I could think to do was use a folded piece of my shirt that I was wearing to gently scrape my eyeball clean. Only when you are using a shirt to wipe your bare eyeball, there is not a very gentle way to do this. So I bit down on a wooden spoon and went to work.

It didn't take too long to do, but afterwards I could just tell I was in for a real treat in the morning.
Here I had combined the two things that I least wanted resting on my eyeball; flying projectiles and bacteria. Whoo Boy, I could not wait to see (literally) what was brewing on my my eyeball.

This morning when I woke up, surprisingly, I had forgotten the whole thing! That is until I went to use the facilities and realized that I couldn't open my eye on account of it being welded shut with crust and goop.

Awesome!

Once I had successfully removed most of the junk, and wiped away the goop, I was pleased to see that my eye wasn't really even infected, or at least, it had done a pretty good job of cleaning up after itself.
Which is nice.

It's the little things that count.

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