Dads.

Last year everyone forgot about me on Father's Day.
It was alright, Axe was only 3 months old, and T-Dubs is a robot incapable of feeling.
What I mean to say is that I was not surprised.
A funny thing that happened was that I was wished a happy fathers day by a woman on the train, right in front of my "family" and STILL nothing clicked.

T-Dubs-"What did she say?"
Me-Dubs- "have a nice day... or something."

It might have been my own fault, karma for all the times I forgot to call my own Father.
But he didn't even live with us that much, and it is hard for me to remember people exist outside of my immediate sight.

This year we are broke.
Last year we were broke, but this year we are more broke, and so I was not expecting anything.
And nothing is what I got.
What can I do? My son is too small to be making me cards, or macaroni jewelry.
He has no disposable income, like I said, things are tight so anything he would have used to buy me a gift has gone to groceries or diapers.

But I look at the things that he does, or has done in my life, and I feel like these are the true gifts.
He sat with me and we ate our oats on the couch.
He lets me smell his head and kiss his face.
He laughs at my jokes and all of my physical attempts at humor.
I love to put him down to sleep, not because of the break that it provides, but because of the way he just sighs and rolls over and is immediately snoring.
I give him his bath at night and this is, I think, our very favorite ritual.

I just love him so much, and because of this I cut him a lot of slack in the gift giving department.
His healthy presence is my healthy present.
His explosive energy, his goofy chuckle, his little chipped tooth, his chubby hands and long legs.
Every morning, picking him up from his bed.
These are the gifts that keep on giving, like a jelly of the month club.

And who knows, it is still early.
There still may be a walk to the coffee shop in the near future.

Take care.
lovamtewh