A Stranger.

I don't know what to say.
I think this is the first "Christmas" that I was not in Wisconsin.
I think this is the most sleep I have gotten since the baby was born.
I think that is what T would say, but she is still asleep.

Actually, I know all those things.
So never mind.

It is gray today, not really cold, but not very inviting.
Mom is at work, I am with Grandma and Nathan.
The only thing on my list right now is to get some diapers.
I think that is what I will do.
I will worry about the aftermath... after.

Take care, I hope you are well.
lvomahwte

The silence walking the streets.

Pressed Ashes.

An act of god, that is what they would call it.
Being snowed in and not being able to fly in the plane.

I am supposed to be in Wisconsin.
My Mom is supposed to be in New York.

But neither of us is where we thought we would be.
Apparently we are right where we belong.

Truen has been dreaming about mice and rats.
I been dreaming about bugs and seeds.
It is times like this when I not only wish I had a dream catcher, but that I knew how to use it as well.

I hope you are all well, I got some time off now, so I got some things to talk about when you are ready.
Garrett, I am looking at you.
While you sleep.

lvomwhte

Give and Take.

Do you know about Truen?
She at one time had a small internet business.
She was in the business of telling people things.
She sent out postcards to people FOR people.

She would keep up correspondences for you.
Basically that is what she would do.
Because let's face it, you are not very good at keeping in touch, are you?

I don't know why, but it burnt Truen out.

So it is not something that she does anymore, but she still makes postcards.
She sells them at a shop in the West Village.
And she sold them all out the other day!
Hooray!

She also draws comics.
I know this for a fact.
We have a bunch of them in our house.
I encourage all of you to visit her website and
houd her for some copies of her comics.
They are funny and weird.
I have a link to her in the sidebar.
Check it out.

If you like me, then maybe you will like her.

I like her a lot.
A LOT!!

lovmatewh

An Idea Realized.

An idea realized.

That is what this is.
That is what I want my life to be.

So far, so good.

There are gifts down stairs, they are mainly for the Burger.
They are all from the grandmas.
Mainly they are.

Do I feel bad about this?
Well, yes and no.
It is a topic of discussion between Del and I.
The subject of money, and it's effect on your life.
Your mind and well being.

When you go into someone's house and there is a huge tree that is seemingly held up by the wrapped presents beneath it.
And when you look around and notice the room is already full of the riches you know you won't ever have in this life time.
These experiences give me a clarity that I couldn't get anywhere else but someone's brand new house in the West Village.
It is like standing in an advertisement.
Soulless and boring and mesmerizing.

It could have just as easily been your house.
Maybe if you had had different parents, or if you had made one single different choice when you were younger.
Then maybe all of this and more could be yours.
Maybe.

I guess the point is that I am broke for Christmas, but not for life.
I can get by, I have been getting by for a long time.
I get occasional help from people that love me, and for this I am grateful.
But for the most part, it is T and I scraping by.
The truth is that this is the life we made for ourselves.
It suits us, and we must enjoy it because we don't really do much to change anything.

So no presents this year.
Not from Mom and Dad.
But don't take it personally son, you just don't know any better right now.
And honestly, you have a Mom and Dad that do everything they can and more for you.
I love you more than my limited vocabulary allows me to express.
And that is all you need right now.
From us anyways.

lvoamthwe

You are the one that is being weird.

So did I tell you about the group show?
I was in a group show at a gallery called Exit Art.
It is over on 10th Avenue and 36th Street in Manhattan.
It was a good time.
I can't really go into specifics, so if you want to know more about it, I guess you should look on their website.

I am sorry, I just got a bad case of the Mondays.
I mean the blues.
Or something like that.

Maybe it is because Truen's parents left this afternoon, creating an awkward vacuum to come home to.
It could also be because I am worried that the lunch I got at the street stand was poisoned.
Or it could be that I m supposed to fly home to WI on Friday, and it is supposed to be snowing a bunch
and I am worrying myself into a panic that I will get stuck at an airport for my entire Holiday break.

It is a lot of all of those things and more that are creating my mood.
My bummed out mood.

But the Burger is good, he is crawling and pulling himself up on whatever his little claws can grip.
The Missus is also good despite her constant audible ear popping.
She got mad at me though for telling her how to cook dinner.
She threatened to never attempt another meal!

WELL, SAW-RRRY!

Now it is silent time to let that threat sink in a bit.
Just the scratching of her pen and popping of her ears vs. my timid typing.
I think she will win.

Be good, lovmthwe

We're watching you.

I am not done yet!
That is what I yell at T when she is trying to cut in line.

There are three generations of Moms currently occupying my
personal space.
The nerve!!
They have turned my son against me!
He hardly recognizes me anymore.
He screams and slaps me in the face and claws at my eyes.
But not in the playful way that he used to.

I tell him, I say "that hurts my feelings boy!"
And then he just smiles and giggles at me.
What a jerk.

An adorable jerk.
My jerk.

I hope all is well.
I been trying to talk to some people.
It is not that easy to do.

lovemathew