Monday, October 29, 2012


Here I am after a very pleasant day holed up in the Boat, winds whipping outside, the building is actually shaking. The rain hasn't really hit yet, I mean, it's raining, but not like a downpour. Yet.
So I am eating a piece of chocolate.
A little piece of chocolate.
There was a lot of eating today.
Stress eating, as well as eating all of the perishables in the fridge.
I just bought that mayonnaise, I'll be damned if I'm throwing it out!
Other things I ate in a ravenous state over the sink were:
My feelings.
My worry.
My dreams.

HA! Just kidding, my dreams always have tasted terrible.
It's a defensive mechanism to keep me from actually ever eating them.
Just in case the straights become so dire.
I may starve, but at least I still got my dreams!!

Burger had a cold and so we spent the day watching movies.
Every once in a while I would break away to listen to the radio, sip coffee and watch the storm unfold outside.

I remember one time, I was very little, and my Mom and I were stuck in a storm while camping. The tent fell down around us and when I woke up we were in the car with the rain and wind pummeling the car. I fell back asleep and in the morning, I woke up and we had breakfast and drove home.
I don't remember being that scared even though I remember being in the tent as my Mom was screaming for me to wake up.
I guess everything was still so new, I had no idea that that wasn't something to be scared of.
I don't know.
But now, being able to put myself in my Mom's shoes at that point, I feel like I want to puke.
And I am 99% sure it isn't the jar of mayonnaise.
It is the fear of the situation, rushing back to me from 30 years ago.
Frantically fighting the elements to try and save someone you love.
Ugh, what a terrible feeling.
I'd rather eat two jars of mayonnaise.

But hopefully it won't come to that this evening.
I got my flashlights, I got a roll of Ritz Crackers, and for good measure I am packing our "go bag" as soon as I say good night.
Good Night.

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