I like them like boo-lets.

Hot coffee.
I like to drink hot coffee.
I like to think of it sterilizing my mouth, throat and esophagus with it's intense heat.
Luckily, by the time it reaches my stomach, it has cooled enough to only cause me enough of a stomach ache to request the rest of the day off from work.
Sorry dudes! I got some "man problems".
What have you been up to?
Have you been to Wisconsin lately?
Has it asked about me?
Have you seen Brett?
Is he doing alright?
I'm talking to YOU Mississippi!
I don't even know what else to tell you guys.
I had an incredible idea today while I was walking home.
It was a vision!

Be good guys.
lovematthew

Smell the lotion in the air.

It is hot.
Outside, it is hot outside.
I bought some shorts.
I broke down and just went for it.
I would just like to be comfy, you know?
So shorts it is!
Are there things that you feel like you might be missing out on?
In life and stuff I mean.
I work a lot you know, I know you know this.
It is why I am cranky when you call me up to hang out.
It is why I have been reflecting so much.
I wonder.
Did you read the Road?
That book man, that book fucking rules the universe.
It is sad because it depicts a world that no one wants to live in, but it gets me so stoked about life.
What do you call that?
Bittersweet?
Ironic?
Anyways, I think about that book, and other doomsday scenarios, and I think about my life and what I am doing with it and I start to feel like, I don't know, maybe there is more?
How long do I stay in this job?
How long do I stay in this city?
How long before I start walking and I don't look back?
When do I set off on the Road?
...
Is there a road to Amsterdam?
I want to walk down THAT road.
be good,
lovematthew

Meditate on the Twix Bar.

Did you know that there is a new "limited edition" Twix candy bar?
It is like, ALL chocolate.
The cookie.
The caramel.
The chocolate.
Yeah, I bought one.
It was alright, but you know...
It was still a Twix.
When I was done, I was still just sitting in the truck... sweating.
I can run home in under ten minutes.
It takes me 30 minutes to walk in the morning.
When I run I make a noise like a siren that you hear when a tornado is coming for you.
Wwwwwaaaaahhhhhoooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!
It is a way to help me breathe better when I am running.
Also, I sweat a lot.
I call it my leg lubrication.
I lubricate a lot.
DUDE!
You know how I am working for the weekend?
Well, this is a three day weekend so you know what!?
Now I am working for a three day weekend.
be good.
lovematthew

Two thoughts from my truckin' life.

Have you seen these ads for the new Die Hard movie?
They are on the sides of all the busses.
It is a banner that says "Yippee Ki-Yay Mo..."
The F'ed up thing about this is that as you may or may not know, John McClaine doesn't actually get to say his trademark saying.
The movie is rated PG-13.
No swearing or some shit.
So who cares?
I don't care.
I was stoked about a new adventure set within the DIe Hard Universe.
But, I guess I am more stoked when I first hear about something, and then you spend months, or years, waiting.
And on the internet you can see all this pre production stuff.
And by the time you can see the movie, you have already seen enough in the trailers and promotional garbage, what is the point?
I have a brilliant marketing idea.
If you want to use this, you can.
The idea is that there is NO marketing campaign until maybe a week before the movie, or product is launched.
That way, you don't give the public any time to form brain callouses.
I thought this would be especially effective for video game consoles.
PLUS then you don't have a bunch of people waiting to rip your shit apart because you didn't live up to their expectations.
I want to proclaim that I just coined the term "Brain Callous".
I also want to go ahead and coin the term "Manstration".
This would be for the male that experiences a sudden surge in hormones and bursts into tears uncontrollably.
You know, like the man period.
Like the woman period, without the 'Pons.
I get mine every other month or so, and I am jsut about due, so cut me some slack.
I just also need to ask this, so you know how in every Die Hard John McClaine says his line?
"Yippee Ki-Yay Mother Fucker!" And then he shoots something and it explodes?
Well, Do you think on the days that he is having his adventure he is just waiting and waiting for the right moment to say that?
And do you think that there are times when he WISHES he said it, but the moment passes and he is like "FUCK! I should have said my line!"?
I bet that happens.
I just had an idea for the best ending of Die Hard 5.
Like, he saves the president or some shit and then they shake his hand, but John is really upset because he wasn't aware that he had just killed the last of the bad guys, and... wait for it... HE NEVER GOT TO SAY HIS LINE!
CUT!
PRINT!
THAT'S A WRAP!
be good guys.
lovenatehw

A Blanket Statement.

I thought that I should take the time while I still have it to let you know that I am doing fine.
Despite everyone's best efforts to do me in.
I have to go to work again, it will be Monday after all.
But you know, even though I spent two of my four days off puking out my stomach lining, I had a really nice hour or two today.
I sat in a small park, like a garden.
It was really nice.
I sat in the sun.
I watched squirrels.
I watched birds.
I imagined how terrifying it would be if birds were 5 times larger than they are normally.
Like if the smallest bird was the size of a large dog.

Those were my nice hours.

Be good.
Lovemathew

you have to get that.

I bought a ticket to go home for a little while.
I mean home like the Wisconsin kind of home.
I don't know what I am doing lately, besides working I mean.
I work a lot.
Then, when I am done there, I come home and work at home.
Talking counts as work right?
It better because it is fucking exhausting sometimes.
I am pretty sure I should be getting a pay check sometime soon in the mail, or maybe left for me on my pillow.
Like a mint at a fancy hotel.
Are there things that you ever do and suddenly you feel like you took a step back into your high school shoes?
Those would be Airwalks in my case.
I know that plenty of time has passed since then and now, but why do I feel like I wasn't paying attention to what was going on? Where was I?
Shouldn't I have made some progress in how I cope?
In fact, when I look back on it, all high school did was give me a false idea of what life outside of high school would be like.
I can only keep busy, I am fine when I am busy.
I can't cope.
I can't always relate.
I can't save.
I can't decide.
I am just kidding, I can do all of that stuff.
Just not very well, or often.
lovematthew

MOVE! MOVE MOVE!!

Have you ever tried Heroin? Yeah, I capitalize Heroin, I think it has earned it.
But have you?
I have not. I don't mind needles, and I compulsively steal spoons, so I am not sure what is keeping me from what might be the single most important decision I might ever make.
I work a lot.
I think about it every day, while I am working.
I think about how this seems like very risky behavior. Like I might never get out, I might get too deep and by the time I realize what I have done, I have signed myself up for a life of heavy lifting, sweating through my pants (EWWW!) and subsisting on deli sandwiches and coffee.
A quick list of things that I like to do:
-Draw
-Relax
-Talk with my friend
Also that double acts as a list of things I never get to do anymore.
But they pay me well, so I will just shut my mouth and think of something to spend my money on.
The American way!
lovemattehw

The Big Spoon.

What do you think about?
Do you think about losing touch?
Sitting between two hardened men, in the middle of a congested block of traffic, do you wonder what your Dad is doing thousands of miles away? Mending an incision for 30 years? Watching thunderheads crash together above the mesas?
Do you think about your friends that you don't talk with anymore?
The ones that are even further away than your Father?
The ones that seemingly got ripped away and feel lost forever?
What about your little brother? What is he doing?
Is he growing into a person you won't recognize the next time you see each other?
Is he still smoking weed? Does he have a girlfriend? Does he like his job?
Is your Mom still a busy little bee? Always buzzing around until it is time to go to sleep?

Are you losing touch with everything or does it just feel that way?

When you look in the mirror, do you even recognize yourself? Less hair? A couple extra pounds? Physically stronger, emotionally weaker? Loss of appetite? Loss of space?

I found 11 dollars on the subway steps the other day, so I'm not sweating it.
loveamttehw