Good crew

Despite feeling less than 110% this week, I had a good last few days on the job.

It was all about the crew, and I had a good one.

I can only own my own good work, but everyone was on it  for 

this last job. 

And it made all the difference.

It is such a nice feeling when you can focus on your task and 

know that everyone else is on the same page, on their tasks, 

and we are all working towards the same goal.

It helped that there was an endless supply of M+Ms.

A good crew makes any job satisfying, if not fun.

If they don't make it fun, then they make it tolerable.

Sometimes that is all one can hope for in a job, that it be tolerable.

It is not always that I get put with a good crew.

There are times when the crew sucks, and then OH MY GOD does the job suck.

Minutes morph into hours, lunch feels like torture and you 

feel miserable and hopeless and everything is just awful.

So it is easy to appreciate when things are good.

Because you know that things can easily be bad.

With the wrong crew.

The Only.

I was thinking the other day.

I was thinking, if you want to do a good job, you will do a good job.

I know that that sounds probably pretty easy and in a way, dumb.

That is until you discover that the main key for this to work is

a commitment and desire to see this through

forever until you just drop dead,

or don't wake up...

Whichever comes first.

There is no end in sight, it is just the way you live

until you can live no longer.

Now what's dumb?!

 Anyways, it was just a thought I had.

No big deal, and you know, take it with a grain of salt.

I am no one's boss.

That doesn't mean I wouldn't make a good boss.

It's just not in my immediate plans.

You know how there is that show where there is an undercover boss

that works alongside the employees to see how the ground level

jobs pan out and they empty garbage cans and take orders and mop

floors and the whole time no one knows that the boss is actually

the one manning the fry basket?

I just pretend that I am that boss, always, secretly 

working alongside my "coworkers" without 

making "boss pay" or having "boss responsibility".

It is a magical trick to get me through the day.

Fake it til you make it.

loveyouguys

 

Lift With Your Heart.

Today was one of those days, like the old days where you just can't seem to tackle the mountain of work in front of you and you spend a lot of time looking around at the grandeur of the space in which you are currently packing it's contents for transport to some different place that is probably more grand than the current occupancy in which you are spending precious moments that you will never get back no matter how hard you wish and no matter how hard you work because just looking around you know that these people made different life choices earlier on in their lives that resulted in a whole shit load of responsibility you never wanted and are thankful you don't have because really this is just one big carrot leading to nowhere special and besides, the only people that have this many art books are the people that can't make art for themselves... And this is what you talk about as you drive over the bridge, back to your tiny apartment where everything makes sense to you and you feel like you can actually 

breathe.

Finally.

Bouncing Down.

This is basically what my job boils down to.

Oh and also I go to work.

From here on out I will be referring to my stint of unemployment as my "heroic sabbatical" if anyone asks. I don't know why, but that sounds hilarious to me especially given the recent life changes that went down.

I say that like life doesn't change all the time anyways. But you know what I mean. You know.

You know...

Quickly a few things and then I am out:

-I forgot how much sitting is involved with this kind of work.
-I have to pack more snacks.
-Wait, no! Not more snacks, just better, healthier snacks.

Suddenly my days are totally, completely, 100% full.
It's nice and distracting.
That sounds dangerous.

Finally, my project has passed 60% on Kickstarter, if you haven't gotten a chance to check it out, please give it a shot.
You guys know me.
I am a pretty solid dude.
I won't steer you wrong.

Little Eyes.

Maybe you already saw this guy.

The phone rings and then all of a sudden I have a place to be today.

I have a kit and a lunch to pack.

I have a bike ride ahead of me.

But first! Some chocolate.

Because that is important.

It communicates that you are worth it.

 

You have to keep an open line of communication between 

you and yourself.

 

So if you have not already seen this a million times, 

Might I suggest you give it a looksee?

 

It's not that I am worried about not meeting my funding goal.

What I am worried about is that you will miss out

on being part of a special project.

That would be a heartache.

Besides, there are multiple days left.

And if you grew up watching the Green Bay Packers, you know that overcoming insurmountable odds is just another part of the job when you want to be really awesome at life.

Who could want anything more for themselves?

From Life?

I gotta pack the bike.

I got somewhere to be!!

love you guys.

Hot Toddying Around.

It's cold here now. 

Wet, cold wind.

Not here in the picture, but here in my head.

Outside it is actually quite nice.

Not really though.

It is like I said.

I was in line at the airport and I remembered too late that I had my pocket tool on my belt.

I was all like

"CUSS!"

I asked the security guy if it was really that big of a deal?

Of course he says "yes" and acts like he should Taser me just for asking.

So of course then I just wanted to kick his shins and make a break for it.

Run Burger RUUUN!!!

Instead it had to go in the "trash" which really means into his pocket.

What a fucker. I know he was just doing his job.

But the way that he said I had to toss it...

I could just tell he really enjoyed that part of his job.

Which I can't fault him for.

One time I denied a customer her latte because she wanted to pay with a Canadian nickel.

I was like "Oh HELL no" and this was after I had already made her drink.

The rules are the rules, right?

Bah!

Since everything is connected, I just reminded myself that it was no big deal.

I had a great time in Wisconsin, and this was just a way of paying my dues I guess.

So, there you go Universe, you're welcome.

Besides, even though it was a really nice pocket tool, it was not my favorite of all time.

This one was very heavy.

I actually had to wear a belt.

Soon another pocket tool will find it's way into my pocket/

Whatever, pass it on bro.

The past is the past and all that.

How are you doing?

I mean, how are you REALLY doing?

Any awkward dinners you want to talk about?

Cold sweats of panic?

Tiny indiscretions?

Talk to me.

I'm all yours.

Take Five.

I'm sitting here at the house, it is quiet, the Boy is in bed and it is raining outside.

I am alone, which is nothing new as of late and recently.

I'm talking physically, not spiritually or whatever.

I am alone in my head.

Taking stock.

Wondering.

I was in a building today, an old institutional one with that kind of floor that you see in old schools and government buildings. Google image search is failing me right now, but it looks like a million pebbles flattened into a base of resin, and then polished to a high gloss. You know what I mean.

Close your eyes and picture first grade, and what the floor looked like. 

That.

Anyways, it wasn't so much how the floor looked, but how it smelled.

It took me right back to a particularly pleasant job I had as a janitor at a hospital.

One of my favorite times to have that job was when we would close off a hallway and re wax the floors.

First we would wipe it down with a chemical stripper, and then scrape it off with a large floor buffer.

We would do this at least twice, to make sure we got all the old wax up and off the floor.

Next we would rinse the floor a few times, allowing about 5 minutes between each rinse so the floor could dry.

Then came the new wax, and this stuff had such a great smell, I mean, as far as chemicals that you probably shouldn't drink are concerned, this stuff smelled delicious! And this would go on with at least four coats with a drying time of about 15 minutes between each coat. 

By the time we were done doing this, the shift was over and the floor was like a sheet of oiled glass.

It was beautiful.

The stripped down linoleum was so dry and cracked and flat, but with the wax, SHAPOW! 

Brand new floor.

Today in this building I got a whiff of that wax and it almost made me cry.

It took me right back to a different life, in a different place... a different me.

I had to bolt from the building.

I didn't even grab any of those free NYC condoms that they are always trying to give out.

No time!

Must. Run. From. Past.

And now what? This is a time for pondering. What have I got to say for myself?

Fresh, new me.

What's up with that guy?

Lot's of stuff that'd make your head spin.

That's what.

lovmatewh

Praise table.

Oh man.
Oh my lord!

This was a long, long week.
This was an exercise in patience, tolerance,
and climbing into a hole.
Mentally.
A mental hole.

Oh my god.
I been so out of it dude.

Here are some
ways to calm a
baby down:

1. Roll the baby over and then roll him over again.
Pretend like he is slowly, slowly rolling down a hill.
And remember, ALWAYS support their tiny rolling heads.

2. Pick him up and then put him down like, 20 times in a row.

What are you doing?
I been thinking about all kinds of things.
Life kinds of things.

Houses.
Cars.
Jobs.
Money.
Drawing.
Building.
Relaxing.
Baby.
Marriage.

I have to be honest and direct.

I some how put myself into this life.
The life I have now.
And I guess I have been slowly putting these pieces together.
I didn't just wake up married with a baby.
I built this box around myself.

I have to go eat something or whatever.
Truen offered to bake me a pizza.
YESSSSS!!!!!!

lovmasrthwe

Oh shit!
I totally forgot to tell you about the table I built for Truen...
In 1 HOUR!